To Fish or Not to Fish

I’ve been helped and have helped. I’ve helped other people and have been helped by other people as well. I’ve benefited from all of the help I’ve received and I’ve felt blessed being able to help others that are also in need.


However, the one thing I’ve found to have been really beneficial to both me and whomever it was that’s helped me was the time spent to have taught me how to fish. And I’ve had quite a handful of “life fishing” lessons from people who took the time to show me the ropes and have taught me the rudiments to fish for my own food and to be able to be good at it so that I can then teach other people how to “fish” till they get good at it.


However, like many of you who have loved ones, we can get crazy and passionate in helping them that we tend to “fish” on their behalf. Instead of showing and teaching them how to cast a net, we set out to sea ourselves and feed them with our own catch. And there's no problem with that... until you're taking away from your own family's catch. But that’s our "nurture" instinct, specially toward other people who also matter to us. But does it truly help them? And does it truly help you?


Most of the time, the people who've ask for help and support aren’t the most sensitive about issues their "fishermen" are having. For example, in the past, I’d go ask for help from any of my aunts without conscious regard if they were capable of helping me or not at that specific moment. And sometimes, I'd feel bad if they couldn't spare me a "fish" or two. (how selfish!)


I would remind whoever that was helping me that they “committed” to fish for me! (was I even entitled?) I didn’t even care if that person was even in good shape to “fish” for me. It was all for my benefit at the expense of other people. It was their fault if they disappointed me. (how absurd!)


Falling face flat on the ground a decade ago made me realize that I had to learn how to fish for myself. I had to be a fisherman and not a mere consumer of someone else’s catch. I realized that the more I “set out to sea” to acquire my own catch, the more other “fishermen” were willing to help me out.


It wasn’t long until I had “seasoned” fishermen teaching me better principles on HOW TO FISH and how to multiply my catch exponentially. I earned the respect of others and I felt good about myself. I counted my blessings and have shared them as well. And it has been better, both for me and the person that I've helped. The result always yields a different kind of pride.


Now stop for a moment and think about where you are in the sea of life. Are you by the shore, waiting for the fishing boat to set in so that you can ASK (not buy) for some catch. Or are you out there with the rest of the fishermen, casting your net and taking home your own catch no matter how little… no matter how great?


Enjoy the week!


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Photo by Andy Zapata Jr.